This is love. This is new love. When I first got divorced, I am not going to lie, I was really scared that I was going to be alone forever. I knew it would be hard to meet someone, and to add to it as a divorced women with three children. Oh, and to add to that, a divorced woman that was NOT open to having any more children. Some may have said I was being a bit rigid, maybe I was. I just wasn't ready to explore love. I was still heartbroken.
Reluctantly I went out, and just as I was about to throw in the dating towel a tall handsome blonde walked into a coffee shop. We had scheduled a date to meet, and I swore to myself before this date this is the LAST TIME I am going out with someone I know nothing about. I mean, this is like a job interview for sex. Fine, ok. I'll go.
A year and a half later and I have a big smile on my face. He makes me happy. I feel safe and loved. We started out completely casual. I had no intention of getting back into a serious relationship. I had just survived a painful divorce by the skin of my teeth. I was very direct in stating the obvious, this is casual. He was down for it, and we had a wonderful time getting to know each other without the pressure of a serious relationship and all the expectations that come along with that. Slowly we got to know each other, and we grew to love each other. We set a foundation that was healthy without the pressure that most people put on relationships when they begin.
I think the takeaway is just go. Even if you don't want to go out on that date, just do it. I would advise no dinner dates as first dates though and for sure have an escape plan going in.